Showing posts with label Animals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Animals. Show all posts

Saturday, 26 September 2015

The world's richest animals

The world's richest animals

There's nothing more demeaning than reading a celebrity rich list. A horrible reminder that there are people out there worth more than you and your Facebook friends combined (times 20), it's often littered with celebs who really, genuinely don't deserve the cash they take for granted.
But it's nothing compared to this. Animals, who clearly don't need any more attention than they already have (thanks internet), have been slowly racking up the pennies behind our naïve backs all this time.
With no charitable urges or humanitarian concerns, these selfish beasts have been laughing/barking/squawking all the way to the bank while we struggle along. Here are seven of the worst offenders.

Gunther

Dog (£90 million or $145 million)
Now Gunther isn't just a bit rich, he's absurdly, offensively loaded. The German Shepherd inherited his fortune from his father, who in turn had received the money from his completely not crazy owner Karlotta Liebenstein when she died. Aside from spending his money on the obvious (chewy bones, bitches), Gunther also purchased Madonna's old Miami home and a rare white truffle worth £1,000, a favourite delicacy of pavement-sniffing, bin-foraging dogs.

Blackie

Cat (£15 million or $25 million)
The world's richest cat earned his millions after his owner Ben Rea died. Rea's relatives received nothing while the reclusive millionaire made sure his furry BFF would be kitted out in the finest collars for the rest of his life. As the richest cat in the world, he's earned himself a place in the Guinness Book of World Records yet he's opted for a life outside of the spotlight and his whereabouts are unknown. Has anyone checked the laundry basket?

Gigoo

Chicken (£6 million or $10 million)
Now, it's hard to get too angry with the annoyingly unpronounceable Gigoo. While most of her brothers, sisters, cousins and vague acquaintances are likely to find themselves covered in breadcrumbs and shovelled into the mouths of toddlers, this plucky hen found herself at the centre of publishing mogul Miles Blackwell's will once his wife died. Whether or not his wife died from severe pecking injuries is unknown.

Trouble

Dog (£1 million or $1.6 million)
A sad story here. This poor Maltese terrier, owned by property billionaire Leona Helmsley, found his inheritance slashed from £6 million after relatives contested. The tragic mutt will now have to downscale his spending habits, probably opting for Sheba over foie gras and having to fire the dog who chews his bones for him first.

Tina and Kate

Dogs (£450,000 or $720,000)
While most dogs are aware of their place within the scheme of things (pretty low down), Tina and Kate are two spoilt brats who've actually managed to engineer their way above at least one human. This poor gent is their carer who was paid to look after them and the house they've inherited from their deceased owner. The dogs regularly taunt their slave by burning £50 notes and barking the theme tune to Golden Girls for hours on end. Well, maybe. Rich bitches.

Tinker

Cat (£100,000 or $160,000)
Probably the most shameful entrant on the list is unsurprisingly of the feline family. A manipulative stray called Tinker "befriended" an elderly woman who died soon after leaving him the money in her will and the run of her three bedroom house. Unsurprisingly, this decision angered many and Tinker's nine lives were in danger. Death threats caused him to be moved to a safe house. Sorry, safe mansion.

Silverstone

Tortoise (£16,667 or $27,000)
Now, admittedly Silverstone's total net worth isn't as impressive as some of the other entrants on the list but we're intrigued to know what a 50-year-old tortoise is going to do with all that cash. The former plaything of bookshop tycoon Christina Foyle, Silverstone gained his name after proving himself speedier than expected. Speedier than expected for a tortoise remains slow enough for an easy mugging, so keep your eyes peeled for a gold-plated reptile with a smugger than usual expression. Make a wallet out of him. JOKE! JEEZ!

Saturday, 15 March 2014

Cat Who Attacked Baby 'Went Over The Edge': 911 Caller


Lux the cat, in one of his better moods.
A big, fat cat with a really bad attitude "went over the edge" and trapped an entire family -- including the dog -- in a bedroom at a Portland, Ore., home on Sunday.
In a 911 call obtained by KOIN, Lux, a 22-pound black and white Himalayan cat, can be heard shrieking as his owner's boyfriend, Lee Palmer, spoke to a dispatcher.
"He's trying to attack us," Palmer says on the call, according to KATU. "When I leave the bedroom to let the police in, I'm gonna have to fight this cat."
The owners called 911 after animal control wouldn't pick up. Police arrived and used a dog snare to take the cat into custody and get him in a crate. Lux is calmer now and appeared on camera for local news stations.
The cat-astrophe started when the cat scratched the couple's 7-month-old baby on the forehead. Palmer reportedly spanked the cat, and the animal went ballistic, hissing and chasing family members, who hid in a bedroom. Palmer said the cat has a history of violence.
Lux's owner, Teresa Barker, who is the mother of the baby, was not amused by the incident.
"It's only funny when it's not happening to you," Barker told KPTV. "When this happens to you, I assure you, you will do the same thing."

Saturday, 7 December 2013

Dogs Terrified Of Walking Past Cats, A Dramatic Compilation

Very few things can come between a dog and its owner. Dogs have faced down cars,burglars, and even bears in order to protect humans. Yet there is one obstacle that continues to confound them: cats.
Cats are capable of stopping a dog dead in his tracks no matter how badly he wants past. If a cat happens to sit on the stairs, in a doorway, or in a narrow hallway, everything is lost. Even when a dog's beloved human is on the other side. The pain etched across the dogs face is enough to make you want to explode.
Based on cats other patterns of bullying dogs and humans, its possible that they are holding dogs hostage for their own sick amusement. That or they are on an important mission to protect the rest of the house from the dog because they have been watching too much "Lord Of The Rings". 

Most likely though, cats just don't give a f*ck, and sadly, dogs just care too much. Watch our compilation above of the most painfully adorable cat and dog standoffs that the internet has to offer. 
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